A Womans Heart

Fire In My Bones- Post by Liz Ketcher Catlin A Womans Heart (original posting 9/29/11 on Serendipity blog) I'm reading this book "Captivating" by John and Stasi Eldridge; the back cover makes the statement, which I feel is an appropriate guide to the message inside- " Your heart matters more than anything else in all creation. The desires you had as a little girl and the longings you still feel as a woman are telling you of the life God created you to live" It seems just when I think I have discovered my true self, my true calling, God sits me down and reveals more to the story; opening up more compartments in my heart and exposing the long forgotten hopes, dreams, and disappointments of a scared little girl hiding behind her Granny's coat; things that either I've forgotten or I assumed would never happen so I just let thm float away rather than dwell on the disappointment of unfulfilled dreams. But God. Since my last post in the 'Serendipity' blog, I got a tattoo... It is on my wrist, and it very small (although that didn't diminish the pain; being the pansy that I am, in the 8 minutes it took the artist to actually tattoo it, I though I was going to die!) it simply states "but God!".I have always loved any form of self expression, whether it be t-shirts with sayings on them, bumper stickers that express a belief, especially if they are funny, and tattoos, if they too express a heart felt passion; this one does that for me. "but God!" reminds me and tells others that although I may have disillusions and disappointments and that while my life has had twists and turns that I wish I could have avoided, God has always been in control. So it is with our hearts desires. God tells us "I will give you the desires of your heart". Have you ever wondered why He says that? Wouldn't it make more sense if the God of the universe, all knowing, said "I will give you my hearts desires"? Surely HIS hearts desires are better for me than the things I could come up with, right? He says it that way because our hearts desires ARE His hearts desires! God is the one, in His unconditional love for us gives us a passion for the things that will bring us closer to Him and closer to our true selves; who we were individually created to be. In "Captivating" the author makes the statement ' the culture of women in the church today is crippled by some very pervasive lies. "To be spiritual is to be busy. To be spiritual is to be disciplined. To be spiritual is to be dutiful." No...to be spiritual is to be in a romance with God. The desires to be romanced lies deep in the heart of every woman. It is for such that you were made.' As women, we were designed to be passionate about our desires; to seek the romance of life. Passion and romance are the two things that keep a womans heart beating. Not in the Harlequin Novels sense of the word, but in the truest sense; it's what keeps us motivated and on mission in this life. A passion for those we love, for seeing them succeed, and for playing a role in that success. To be romanced by the one we love, the one we give our heart to. I'm not talking candy and flowers (although that too would be nice from time to time :) but what God shows us the book of Song of Soloman; to show us that the desire we have for romance is not only okay, but that He created that in us. As I get older I think I am starting to see a little more clearly the passions I have for the things of God rather than for myself and I realize how closely related they are; but how I allowed my busyness, disciplines, and self inflicted duties to lead me on a path more towards my own than His. God is showing me, daily, through His word, the book "Captivating" and through the wisdom of godly women He has so graciously placed in my life, that He never intended for me to set aside those dreams and hopes, but to fully act upon them, knowing they are His too for my life. That He really does "place them in our hearts before he places them in our hands". Maybe at 48 years old I'm finally growing up enough to recognize and act upon those things I dreamed of as a child. I'm gone.